waiting & the next step

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i remember the day i came home & told my parents i wanted to be a nurse. i was on jury duty and someone appeared to be having a heart attack. “is anyone here a doctor or a nurse?”…i remember someone shouting that out. i was working in a fancy department store at the time, selling high end cosmetics to the wealthy of atlanta. nothing was wrong with that job. not at all. i’m still in touch with a few of the friends i met back then, almost thirty years ago. but i wanted to do something helpful. i wanted to be able to say, “yes!!! i can help!” if i witnessed an emergency again.

sunday night pulling into the emergency room with dan i wondered, was that a different girl? was i different person that went through nursing school with a calling to pediatric oncology? hospitals are such a daunting place. the sense of nervousness is almost immediate when pulling into the parking lot.

he was feeling out of breath when walking up & down the stairs in our home. feeling sorta sweaty. but we’d eaten a big lunch and gosh, it’s hot here in atlanta. as the day went on he became a little nervous about his symptoms. pressure, not pain, in his chest? was his arm tingly? you know how your mind & body sorta play games with you at this point. my neighbor came & took his blood pressure. the high side of normal. i asked him…do you wanna go in? yes.  when a man says yes, take me to the emergency room you go.

they had him hooked up to an ekg within 3 minutes of us walking through the door. if even. tests were run-coming back clear. and they decided to keep him over night & perform more tests in the morning. i drove madi & i home and tried to sleep for a few hours. missing my guy all the while. not feeling right sleeping alone in our bed.

we ended up spending all day there yesterday with all cardiac tests coming back clear. right before check out, an ER doc walks in & tells us dan’s hemoglobin was low. not transfusion worthy but low. being one of those ” lets suggest the worst case possible scenerio guy” he happens to through out the “lets make sure it’s not cancer” word. of course he’s smiling and of course he throws out the “it could be a minor thing too” disclaimer for back up.

so. we wait. i’m waiting for a callback from our internist now. i’m praying the time between ER, to doctor visit, to tests are not far apart. the waiting is always the hardest part. our minds get all crazy with the unknown ahead. i won’t ramble here. i know i shouldn’t be trying to cross a bridge i’m not mean to cross right now.

but i’d be lying if i said i wasn’t nervous. i’d love your prayers for dan. i realize folks go through weird stuff all the time. and i know there are much more serious things going on today, so i humbly thank you for even thinking of us.

isaiah forty one ten says~”So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous.”

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August 19, 2014 - 9:48 am

Terry - Praying!

August 19, 2014 - 9:51 am

angela - Beth Moore says *Don’t go to the land of *What Ifs*…you might build a house and stay there.* Praying

August 19, 2014 - 10:03 am

Paige - Lifting you both up. Hugs!

August 19, 2014 - 10:14 am

D'Nese giosmama2626 - Praying! And praying some more.

XOXOX

August 19, 2014 - 10:23 am

Christina - sending you lots of good thoughts for Dan’s health and your strength today while you wait. waiting’s not easy. it downright stinks, actually. Someone is watching over you though, and will not give you more than you can handle. xox~c

August 19, 2014 - 10:35 am

cathy g. - praying for you!!!

August 19, 2014 - 10:42 am

susie - Sending prayers your way!!!

August 19, 2014 - 11:18 am

Kacey - Praying for all of you!

August 19, 2014 - 11:33 am

muga - Ptayers sent for complete speedy healing for Dan and God’s Peace, comfort and strength for him and all of his girls.

August 19, 2014 - 11:49 am

sandy j - Paige, I heard a saying once from a dear friend when great concern came over my mind, “This is good” and at first I thought how can she say that. God sees and hears everything, trust him, he knows just what he’s doing for you, Dan and the family. You and your family are chosen people, you stand on victory :O) xo

August 19, 2014 - 12:10 pm

Curtis & Sherrie - Prayers coming from California.. Know that what ever it is God will be with you through it…. Blessings to you and your family… Curtis & Sherrie

August 19, 2014 - 1:03 pm

Karen - You know I am praying hard. I know with your story tho how easy your mind can go there and be flooded with memories. Praying for you and dan. Keep us all posted!!

August 19, 2014 - 1:11 pm

Susie McKenzie - Lifting prayers right now. My husband is going through a waiting process, and have been since March, to begin a stem cell transplant process. The scripture you quoted above is the one we immediately claimed as we continue to this process.

Will continue to lift you family up to our Mighty God!

August 19, 2014 - 2:24 pm

Tracey - Prayers going up for you and your family! Keep us posted.

August 19, 2014 - 2:32 pm

Christy - Waiting and praying with you!
xo

August 19, 2014 - 3:17 pm

chrissi - sending prayers♥

August 19, 2014 - 3:19 pm

becky - oh paige… many prayers being sent your way. He’s got this!

August 19, 2014 - 4:05 pm

Peggy - Paige honey,

I’ve been praying for you, Dan, the doctors, the girls and pretty much everyone one even remotely involved every since I first heard about this… pretty much non-stop.

August 19, 2014 - 4:18 pm

Kimberly Falls - I know how hard it is to wait on test results…praying for y’all!

August 19, 2014 - 5:32 pm

Cindy - Paige, Saying many prayers for all of you and keeping you in my thoughts. Please keep us posted.

August 19, 2014 - 8:06 pm

Jan Fusco - Praying for you all.

August 19, 2014 - 8:11 pm

Destiny - Please add my name to the list of those who are praying for Dan.

August 19, 2014 - 8:49 pm

jodi - paige, please know that I am hoping and praying for you, dan and the girls….you have been on my mind…please take care!

jodi

August 19, 2014 - 9:14 pm

Kathy - I am praying, too. Answers, healing and peace.

August 19, 2014 - 10:01 pm

JuliaW - Prayers for you all. May the waiting be quick and the results be good!

August 19, 2014 - 10:14 pm

Andrea - Paige…sending prayers…..

August 19, 2014 - 10:53 pm

Hannah Avery - Praying for y’all right now!

August 19, 2014 - 10:57 pm

Adrienne - Lifting up your sweet family right now!

August 19, 2014 - 11:46 pm

Rhonda - Praying

August 20, 2014 - 8:08 am

Victoria & Katie Savannah Amos - Oh Friend,
This dagnabit situation just stinks for your family…..and yes, I just used a Mommie cuss word. Katie Savannah and I send you mental dark chocolate and a hand embroidered hankie for each and every one of you…..much better quality than what I handed you at Becoming!
In Him,
The Amos Girls
Victoria & Katie Savannah

August 20, 2014 - 9:00 am

Jackie - Oh, Paige. Yes, the waiting is the hardest part. Praying for all of you and hopeful for good news.

August 20, 2014 - 7:33 pm

Pam - The waiting is so hard- praying God’s peace for you, Dan, and the girls.

August 20, 2014 - 9:27 pm

Donna - I know the exact nervousness of the hospital parking lot as we have had several big emergencies in my family. May a God comfort your heart and keep you all in his loving care. Praying for Dan.

August 20, 2014 - 11:05 pm

Beth Gerding - Paige,
I am so sorry to hear this. I know this must be a very scary time for you, waiting on these test results. Keeping you and your family in my thoughts, and praying for good news for you and Dan.