i remember the day i came home & told my parents i wanted to be a nurse. i was on jury duty and someone appeared to be having a heart attack. “is anyone here a doctor or a nurse?”…i remember someone shouting that out. i was working in a fancy department store at the time, selling high end cosmetics to the wealthy of atlanta. nothing was wrong with that job. not at all. i’m still in touch with a few of the friends i met back then, almost thirty years ago. but i wanted to do something helpful. i wanted to be able to say, “yes!!! i can help!” if i witnessed an emergency again.
sunday night pulling into the emergency room with dan i wondered, was that a different girl? was i different person that went through nursing school with a calling to pediatric oncology? hospitals are such a daunting place. the sense of nervousness is almost immediate when pulling into the parking lot.
he was feeling out of breath when walking up & down the stairs in our home. feeling sorta sweaty. but we’d eaten a big lunch and gosh, it’s hot here in atlanta. as the day went on he became a little nervous about his symptoms. pressure, not pain, in his chest? was his arm tingly? you know how your mind & body sorta play games with you at this point. my neighbor came & took his blood pressure. the high side of normal. i asked him…do you wanna go in? yes. when a man says yes, take me to the emergency room you go.
they had him hooked up to an ekg within 3 minutes of us walking through the door. if even. tests were run-coming back clear. and they decided to keep him over night & perform more tests in the morning. i drove madi & i home and tried to sleep for a few hours. missing my guy all the while. not feeling right sleeping alone in our bed.
we ended up spending all day there yesterday with all cardiac tests coming back clear. right before check out, an ER doc walks in & tells us dan’s hemoglobin was low. not transfusion worthy but low. being one of those ” lets suggest the worst case possible scenerio guy” he happens to through out the “lets make sure it’s not cancer” word. of course he’s smiling and of course he throws out the “it could be a minor thing too” disclaimer for back up.
so. we wait. i’m waiting for a callback from our internist now. i’m praying the time between ER, to doctor visit, to tests are not far apart. the waiting is always the hardest part. our minds get all crazy with the unknown ahead. i won’t ramble here. i know i shouldn’t be trying to cross a bridge i’m not mean to cross right now.
but i’d be lying if i said i wasn’t nervous. i’d love your prayers for dan. i realize folks go through weird stuff all the time. and i know there are much more serious things going on today, so i humbly thank you for even thinking of us.
isaiah forty one ten says~”So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous.”