4:55 am. not my preferred wake up time. i laid there and in no time my mind was playing over & over again the stressful thoughts & fearfulness regarding some current & upcoming issues. looking at the ceiling, i roll my eyes and think seriously? stupid fear. stupid worry. followed quickly by the feelings of have i seriously not got this down yet? have i not learned?
i knew i needed to reroute my thoughts this morning. somedays like today it’s almost an all day battle. so me & a couple miles worked it out & i wanted to share a little what’s on my heart after my run.
so basically nehemiah is a prophet in the old testament. he’s living in persia when he hears that the wall around his hometown has been broken down. the government is a wreck. his people are living shattered and in misery & poverty. he heads down & rallies the town to start rebuilding the wall. along the way he, naturally, meets opposition. & you wanna know what he does? i love it. to the ones that try to distract him, he understood what & why he was doing what he was doing ( wall building) and didn’t lose sight of the greatness of what he was doing….he came back with ” i’m doing a great work & can not come down”.
to those that said untrue things about him, he didn’t get into a debate or even defend himself. he just keeps on moving forward.
to the attack of deceit & lies, he listens to the one that called him in the first place. he didn’t listen to the voice of the enemy. when the lord speaks to us, it inspires faith. when it’s the voice of the enemy, it’s fear.
at the root of each attack against nehemiah was fear. wanna know the most common command in scripture? “fear not”.
so today. when once again that old ugly voice creeps into my thoughts at 4:55, 6;02, 7:33, lunch time, while i’m doing laundry, while i’m trying to do what the lord has currently called me to do, i pray that i too can keep on keeping on. that i can say ” i’m doing a great work & can not come down”. i don’t have time to wrestle around with what if’s, i don’t want to waste my mental energy on fear. i have other things to do. you have other things to do. build our wall. whatever it is, wherever he’s placed us, that is where we rally those around us. they could ages 5, 8 & 10 and home all summer. they could be 19 & heading out to college. they could be a team you’re planting a church with or a group of young mamas needing encouragement. don’t come on down off your wall. you’re doing a great work.
one last thing & i’ll let you go, i dusted off a devotional of mine today & opened to a random day. and sure ‘nuf, guess what it had to say….”your mind so easily slips into the future, where worries abound. you also spend too much time analyzing the past. meanwhile, splendors of the present moment parade before you and you don’t even notice. part of your problem is your tendency to strive for self sufficiency. i will help you learn to rest in MY sufficiency depending more & more on me”.
so let’s focus on the parade in front of us my friends & finish building the wall!
psalm 34.5 those who look to him are radiant. their faces are never covered with shame.
2 corinthians 12.9 my grace is sufficient for you, therefore my power is made perfect in weakness. therefore i will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that christ’s power may rest on me!