i’ve honestly not been able to write this post…and having said that, this won’t even be the full story as something about blogging about it makes it seem even more real.
about a month ago i noticed brinkley was breathing a little rapidly. i primarily noticed this in the evenings when we’d be settling in for the night. he’s slept on a pillow beside my side of the bed for years & i noticed he had quit doing that ( will explain why he quit in the next post). both of which i thought was weird. but nothing else was different. just occasionally i’d notice the rapid breathing.
i packed up later that week & took the bookends down to the gulf coast to photograph a few family sessions. we rolled in around 2am saturday morning…i climbed into bed exhausted & in my driving clothes. i never do that! woke up the next morning & asked dan how the last few days had gone. well, he told me, i didn’t want to tell you because i knew you’d pack up & drive home early…but brinkley hasn’t wanted to eat his last four meals. i dialed the vet immediately & knew something was wrong.
still in the same clothes from the day before we drove him nervously to the vet.
what happened next completely broke my heart….
X-rays showed brinkley’s lungs were full of tumors. we found out a few days later that it was metastatic tumors, advanced stage. we were given a few weeks to a couple months with him.
my mind knows these sweet animals don’t have the same life expectancy as adults. my mind knows that our sweet fella was 10 years old. but my heart wanted him to live with me, sleeping beside me, hanging out with me-in every single room-all day long…forever.
i’ll share a little more about those next few weeks in another blog post as this is all my heart can handle today…between that & moving in our emi my heart has been hurting and trying to get used to the “new” normal around here
we said goodbye to what i’m certain was the best dog in all the evers a week ago friday…
needless to say, i’ll be remembering brinkley forever…while technically he was a rescue dog, i am certain that for the last 8 years his sweet, loyal self rescued me…